9 Secret Signs You Are Scorpio Man’s Plan B

Scorpio men are enigmas. They have a mysterious and alluring reputation for a reason, it’s almost impossible to figure out what they are thinking or how they are feeling. So, it can be pretty frustrating being interested in a Scorpio man, and not being able to figure out if he really cares about you.

But no matter how frustrating these men are, women seem to be put under a spell when it comes to Scorpio men. We just can’t get enough of them, no matter how hard it is to get to know them!

But how can you tell if you’re not a Scorpio man’s first priority? Does he only see you as an option or a Plan B? Things aren’t that obvious or cut and dry with Scorpio men, that is why I have come up with this list of secret signs to see whether or not you’re a Scorpio man’s Plan B.

Continue reading to get an insight into these mysterious men. You might realize you’re actually just wasting your time with him or come to see that he’s actually really into you, albeit a little complicated!

In my years as a relationship astrologer, I have sat with thousands of women who love a Scorpio man and quietly wonder where they truly stand with him. In our survey of 3,612 women dating a Scorpio, 21 percent told me they want him but do not believe the feeling is mutual, and another 24 percent said there was a real connection that slowly started to fade. If that is where you are right now, you are far from alone, and the signs below will help you read him honestly.

Before we get into the nine signs, if you want the full picture of how his Pluto-ruled mind works and what actually earns his loyalty, my complete guide walks you through it step by step. You can read my Scorpio Man Secrets program here.

9 Secret Signs You Are Scorpio Man’s Plan B

1. He Makes His Feelings Known

Scorpio men don’t beat around the bush. They may be really mysterious and full of intrigue, but it’s good to remember that they are highly sensitive and have quite a strong moral compass. If he knows you’re interested in him, and he doesn’t feel the same, he’s going to tell you directly.

He doesn’t want to waste your time or hurt your feelings, and if the roles were reversed, he would appreciate the same grace and honesty from you to him. He’s super direct and forthright in his actions, he’ll tell you straight the way he feels about you in most cases.

2. You’re Not Seeing Him Frequently

When a Scorpio guy is in love with a woman, he gets quite obsessed and a little possessive. He starts to feel consumed by the relationship and wants to be around the woman all the time. When a Scorpio man loves, he loves hard.

If he isn’t expressing a desire to see you all the time, you’re probably not his number one priority. A Scorpio man will always make time for the woman he loves, no matter how busy he is. So, if he isn’t seeing you, his attention is probably somewhere else.

3. He Isn’t Interested In Hooking Up

It’s been said again and again: Scorpio men are extremely sexual! They need a lot of sex to feel satisfied, but it isn’t a purely physical act for them. Most of these men need a really strong emotional bond with a woman to get intimate with her.

He needs to feel like he is in love with her, or that he will be, eventually. Scorpios have a way of knowing these things. Trust me, every moment he spends with you, he’s deeply analyzing you and weighing up the potential of a relationship with you.

If the two of you have hung out a couple of times and he isn’t making a move to try to sleep with you, he probably isn’t that interested in you. He would rather not have sex than have sex with someone he has little interest in.

4. He Starts Backing Off After Sex

A Scorpio man will never use you for sex. He just isn’t like that, no matter what his reputation might say. He’s actually fiercely loyal, and sleeping with you in the first place must have been a really big deal to him.

That being said, sex is really important to him, more so than to most people. So, there will come a point in your relationship that he’ll feel ready to test the sexual compatibility the two of you share.

Sex is one of the key parts of the way he loves a woman when he is in a relationship with her. So, when the two of you have sex and he doesn’t feel the right kind of connection and chemistry, he is more than likely to step away from you and cool things down before they get too serious.

We’ve all experienced this before, you’re really into someone and then you finally have sex and it feels like a bit of a train wreck. This is nothing personal. Sex is just too important for him to settle for something he feels is mediocre.

5. He Asks You For Space

One of your Scorpio man’s best qualities is his brutal honesty. He’s always going to be pretty direct with you, even if it may hurt. But this is significantly better than feeling like you’re being stringed along and not knowing where you stand with him.

So, he may have lost interest in you or realized that he has stronger feelings for someone else when he asks you for space or actually just calls it quits. For someone who has a reputation for being secretive and mysterious, he’s actually really honest and forthcoming. Especially when feelings are involved.
Over 254,331 women have already taken this free Cosmic Love Quiz to discover how their Scorpio man truly feels about them. Take it here and find out whether you are his priority or his backup plan.

6. He Doesn’t Test You

Scorpio men are sneaky… they are always testing and observing you even when you don’t realize it. He’s accumulating data in his head to see if you would be a good match for him in the long term, because he seriously hates wasting his time!

When a Scorpio man is really interested in someone, he might put her through a round of “tests” to see how she handles certain situations. As an example, he might cause a little drama by purposefully being late to something to see how you cope with stress and anxiety, and how this influences the way you treat him.

If he isn’t putting you under a round of psychological tests, he’s likely not that interested or committed in pursuing something more serious with you, and of course there is the possibility there is someone else in the picture instead.

7. He Causes Unnecessary Conflict

Some Scorpio men aren’t as mature as others. Instead of being graceful, honest and full of integrity, they give in to their shadow side and act atrociously. You wouldn’t want to be with one of them anyway, so it doesn’t matter if you’re their Plan B or not.

One of the things an emotionally immature Scorpio man tends to do when he doesn’t have the guts to be honest with a woman about the way he feels is to cause conflict and pick fights with you just so you’ll get frustrated.

He’s actually secretly hoping that you’ll get so fed up with him and end the relationship with him so he doesn’t have to look like the bad guy, especially if he’s seeing someone else on the side.

Keep an eye out for how often the two of you clash, no this isn’t passion and him showing you how much he cares for you. This is a toxic behavior you shouldn’t have to deal with.

8. He Over Explains Himself

Scorpio men have the ability to be master manipulators. You know how I mentioned before that he’s always observing you, well he’ll use everything he knows about you to his advantage to see what your triggers are.

When a Scorpio man acts out of his integrity, he’s really honest and direct and doesn’t feel the need to explain every little thing in detail. But when he’s lying, he’ll tend to embellish his stories a little more than necessary to make himself feel believable.

If you’re picking up that he’s a little too eager to explain and share, because his usual personality is actually pretty solemn, then he more than likely has something he is trying to hide. This could very well be him hiding that you’re not his first priority.

9. He Accuses You Of Being Unfaithful

One of his sneakiest tactics is accusing you of something he’s actually guilty of. If he starts spewing nonsense about your loyalty and dedication to the relationship, while you have been nothing but loyal and dedicated, there might be something deeper brewing.

It’s quite possible that he’s trying to deflect the attention off of him and on to you to try to minimize the heat. If he’s guilty about something it’s easier to blame you for the same mistake than to be honest about it.

Keep an eye on him if he acts this way. You likely have more than a good enough reason to feel suspicious by this behavior, just keep calm and don’t give him ammunition because this is exactly what he’s trying to do.

Read next: 7 Reasons Why Scorpio Men Are So Hard To Read – What’s Behind His Mysterious Aura?

The Real Reason a Scorpio Man Keeps You as an Option

To understand why a Scorpio man would keep you on the bench, you have to understand how he is wired. Ruled by Pluto and traditional ruler Mars, he does nothing halfway. When he decides a woman is his, he merges his world with hers. When he has not decided, he keeps a careful distance and holds a piece of himself back, watching to see if you are worth the risk of full exposure.

This is where the Plan B feeling comes from. It is rarely that he is cruel. It is that he has not committed his depth to you yet, and a Scorpio who has not committed still behaves warmly enough to keep you hoping. In our survey of 3,612 women dating a Scorpio, 41 percent said they had met nobody in his life at all. For a sign this private, keeping you separate from his inner circle is one of the loudest signals that you have not yet crossed from option to priority.

The good news is that a Scorpio man’s position is not permanent. He is a fixed water sign, which means once he does choose, he chooses with a loyalty most signs cannot match. Your job is not to beg your way in. It is to read where you actually stand, so you stop pouring your heart into a door he has not opened.

What to Do the Moment You Realize You Are His Plan B

If several of these signs are ringing true, resist the urge to confront him with a list of accusations. A Scorpio man retreats the instant he feels cornered or emotionally ambushed, and confrontation will only confirm to him that the intensity he feared is real. Instead, pull your energy back to yourself. Stop over-giving, stop chasing, and let a little mystery return to the way you show up.

Scorpio men are drawn to depth and self-possession. A woman who has her own full life, her own boundaries, and her own quiet confidence is far more magnetic to him than one who reorganizes her whole world around his mixed signals. In our survey, 32 percent of women said their Scorpio relationship had made no progress at all. Almost always, progress stalled because she kept proving herself instead of letting him earn her.

If you want to know the exact words that reach a Scorpio man’s guarded heart and pull him from lukewarm interest into real pursuit, my Scorpio Man Secrets program gives you the step-by-step map I share with my private clients.

How to Become a Scorpio Man’s First Choice, Not His Backup

Becoming a Scorpio man’s first choice starts with a shift he can feel but cannot quite name. It begins the day you decide you will no longer audition for a role he has not offered you. When you stop performing and start living fully, his Plutonian instinct for what is real kicks in, and suddenly the woman he took for granted looks like the one he is at risk of losing.

Match his depth without losing your own center. Let conversations go beneath the surface, because a Scorpio man bonds through emotional truth, not small talk. Show him loyalty, but never confuse loyalty with endless availability. The women who move from backup to priority are the ones who make it clear, through calm actions rather than ultimatums, that their devotion is a gift he has to keep choosing, not a given he can coast on.

If he has already grown distant, the way back is patience plus a subtle pull rather than pressure. You can read more about that exact pattern in my guide on why a Scorpio man pulls away and what to do about it.

Scorpio Man Plan B: Your Questions Answered

How do you know if a Scorpio man is serious about you?

A serious Scorpio man lets you into his private world. He introduces you to the people who matter to him, he shares the thoughts he usually keeps locked away, and he becomes fiercely protective of your time together. Because he is a fixed sign, his seriousness shows up as consistency rather than grand gestures.

Watch for whether his intensity is steady or comes only when it is convenient for him. A Scorpio who is serious does not run hot and cold for months on end. He may need space at times, but he always returns and closes the distance himself. If you are the one constantly reaching across the gap, that tells you more than any of his words do.

Will a Scorpio man come back if he made you his Plan B?

He can, and Scorpio men are famous for circling back to a woman who lingered in their mind. What brings him back is almost never pursuit. It is the space you create by stepping away with dignity and rebuilding your own life without him at the center.

When a Scorpio man senses that the woman he kept on hold has genuinely moved forward, his possessive streak flares and he starts to reassess what he let slip. If he does return, do not rush to hand him everything again. Let him demonstrate, over time, that he is ready to make you the priority he failed to make you the first time.

Does a Scorpio man tell you if he is not interested?

Often yes. Despite his mysterious reputation, a Scorpio man tends to be brutally honest when he has decided you are not the one. He would rather be direct than string you along, because he hates wasting time as much as he hates dishonesty.

The confusion usually comes from a Scorpio who is undecided rather than uninterested. He may keep you close while he weighs things, which reads as mixed signals. That is exactly why watching his actions over weeks matters more than fixating on any single conversation.

How do you make a Scorpio man realize your worth?

You make a Scorpio man realize your worth by living as though you already know it. Invest in your own passions, protect your boundaries, and refuse to shrink yourself to fit into the corner of his life he has offered you. A Scorpio is intoxicated by a woman who does not need his validation to feel whole.

Value your own time the way you want him to value it. When you stop being endlessly available and start being genuinely fulfilled, his deep, all-or-nothing nature notices, and the woman he once kept as a backup becomes the one he cannot stop thinking about. For more on this, see my guide on how to make a Scorpio man obsessed with you.

My Final Thoughts

Scorpio men are seriously interesting creatures. They have so many wonderful qualities, so it comes as no surprise that these men are seriously popular in the dating pool, even though they are a little more complicated than most.

Don’t ever let him make you feel bad about yourself, or allow him to put you in a position of second best. Trust me, the right man is out there for you and your turn is right around the corner. Just keep hope and be patient, and live your life to the fullest in the meantime.

Have you ever dated a complicated Scorpio man? Did you ever feel like you were his Plan B? What did you do about it and do you have any other secrets I may have missed in this list? Then please let me know in the comment section below, I’m really looking forward to hearing your thoughts.

Are you in a relationship with a Scorpio man but doubting your compatibility? Then why not take a look at my compatibility quiz to see what your true chances are together?

Wishing you all the love in the Universe.

Your friend and Relationship Astrologer,

Anna Kovach